You’re walking down a forest road when you’re beset upon by goblins! Quick, grab your queer books – it’s time to choose your party!
The first person I knew I wanted in my Queer D&D Party is Harrowhark Nonagesimus from The Locked Tomb series (Gideon the Ninth and Harrow the Ninth) by Tamsyn Muir. What can I say? I’m attracted to raw power, high intelligence, and low charisma. I would sort Harrow as a Chaotic Neutral Warlock – she doesn’t care about following the rules, and I cannot in good conscious claim her to be either good or evil. Instead, she is concerned about doing right by those she cares about (barely), and hang the rest. As for the Warlock bit, she’s clearly a magic user. I think the pact her parents made to kill 200 children to give her power aligns nicely with a warlock’s pack with an otherworldly being. And are you kidding me with her necromantic powers – who needs Turn Undead with Harrow around?
Every necromancer needs a cavalier, and I wanted a physical fighter to balance her magic. The easy answer would be Gideon herself, but that felt like cheating! Instead, I went with Murderbot from The Murderbot Diaries by Martha Wells. Murderbot skews far more science fiction than most D&D campaigns, but I don’t care! I want them on my team, and I trust them to be able to adjust to a new setting with aplomb (and complaints). I think Murderbot would be a Neutral Good Fighter. They’re clearly not lawful because they hacked their governor module and lied about being a free agent. But they’re not really chaotic either; Murderbot just wants to keep its humans safe and watch its shows. And I think they would be a fighter because they’re not really anything else – I can’t see Murderbot as a Barbarian or a Ranger. MAYBE a Monk with its super speed Flurry of Blows, but still. I think fighter best sums up Murderbot’s skills.
One giant problem with my first two choices is the fact that they are extremely anti-social. We need some charisma in this party! And who is more charismatic than a Bard? Enter Tam Hashford from Bloody Rose by Nicholas Eames. She’s new to adventuring, but eager to fit in and earn her keep. She’s used to being around hardened mercenaries, so I don’t think she would be too bothered by Harrow and Murderbot. She could do the talking (and raise a bit of money for the group with a song) when the stumble into a town and need a place to stay.
There’s a lot of chaos in this group, so I think we need someone with a strong moral compass to guide our group. Since Murderbot is constantly getting a little bit exploded, I want to add Jane Hodgson from Alice Payne Arrives and Alice Payne Rides by Kate Heartfield to the group. Her 1789 scientific and mechanical skills seem like a good fit for a D&D setting, so I would cast her as a Lawful Good Artificer. Usually left behind by Alice, I think it’s time for Jane to have some of her own adventures. And we someone in this party to see the wounded
To round everything off, I can’t resist adding Jam from Pet by Akwaeke Emezi. She’s got the heart of a Lawfully Good Paladin, determined to find and destroy monsters, be they literal or metaphorical. It doesn’t hurt that she has Pet, a creature who fills the role of something like the result of a “Find Steed” spell (Pet is an unusually intelligent and strong celestial being!) or the deity who inspires Jam in her monster hunting. Together they’re pretty unstoppable, and that’s exactly what I want in my D&D party.
So that’s it! A pretty ridiculous group of queer characters, which is the recipe for a fun campaign.